Welcome to mixed feelings’ Hyperspecific, a profile series of increasingly intimate questions in which we ask our favorite artists, characters, musicians, and the like to unveil their innermost selves — their weird existential musings.
If it were 2007, you might have described Audrey Hobert as “awkward,” but you’d be wrong. She’s not a wallflower, comfortable only in the most dimly-lit corners of the function. In fact, you’re more likely to find her on the dance floor, performing lanky pirouettes and making strange faces in other people’s selfies — a girl who’s simultaneously in on the joke and is the joke (intentionally).
Hobert’s second single, “Bowling Alley” explores the dichotomy of social anxiety and blown-out confidence perfectly: thinking no one wants you at their party, even though you were invited and feeling like the party doesn’t really start until you walk in. It’s also the song, she says, that feels most like her.
Before releasing her debut album Who’s the Clown? in September, Hobert was best known for co-writing seven songs on then-roommate (and friend) Gracie’s Abrams’ hit record The Secret of Us. It makes sense that the mind that helped contribute lines like, “Said that I was fine, said it from the coffin,” would turn around and deliver bars like “Sorry that your dog died, sorry that I’m like your dream bride,” on her own debut.
And that is her brilliance: Audrey is brazenly funny. She’s the human embodiment of pretending to be a pop star in your bedroom, complete with a desk fan for maximal hair-blowing visual effect (just watch her Fallon performance for proof).
Who’s the Clown? has been on my rotation since its release and after months of listens I can confidentially say that it is one of those rare no-skips feats. It was a joy and a pleasure to interview her for Hyperspecific. Read it below for gems such as: “I just chew nicotine gum. I think it’s less of a coping mechanism and more of a great passion.” — Mi-Anne
LEVEL I
Something you’re always hoping people bring up in conversation.
Something personal about their day that’s specific and also maybe in a way happened to me, so I can say that happened to me, too, today…like Chimichangas.What’s a positive trait people always tell you?
People say I’m funny, and my dad on the phone the other night said I was a joy.
One destructive trait you know you possess and wish you didn’t.
I don’t know if it’s destructive, but one of my least favorite things about myself as I get older is the way that I feel [so uncomfortable] if there is a piece of dead skin or crumb in my sheets. I wish I were someone who could frolic in the grass barefoot and then go right to bed.
I prefer not to have shoes in the house, but if you walk through my house with shoes on, I probably won’t say anything unless you’re my close friend. But I am thinking about how I’m going to mop later.If a bodega were to name a dish after you, what would it be? (Be specific.)
Maybe a chopped cheese named after me called “Audrey’s Chopped Cheese.” I’ve actually never had a chopped cheese.
And if I’m eating between lunch and 4PM it’s a Diet Coke. At night if I’m drinking, I’m going to drink martinis dry up with a twist the way my mom does, and if it’s the morning just black coffee.One song that makes you feel understood.
I discovered the song on the radio about, I don’t know, a year and a half ago or something, but now it’s a big needle-drop moment in Superman, but it’s “Punkrocker” by Teddybears featuring Iggy Pop. I just like that that song is mostly him saying “I’m a punk rocker. Yes, I am.” There’s one line in that song where he says, “I’m bored with being God,” and that’s cool.
I think the song that feels most like me all the time is “Bowling Alley”, but I love “Sex and the City,” too. “Sex and the City” is a little melodramatic and “Bowling Alley” is probably right in line with who I actually am as a person.
I think “Bowling Alley” sort of encapsulates the kind of deep thinker that I can be about things that don’t always require deep thought. I get nervous sometimes and I think that’s a useless feeling — especially at a party.
LEVEL II
A movie/tv show you watch when you want to self-soothe.
It’s got to be Gilmore Girls but I can only watch it between the months of November and January. That is my holiday show and it’s also my most comforting show.
What is your problematic favorite artist, actor, dead or alive?
I have a few problematic faves I feel like I shouldn’t name, but maybe Marni from Girls. I just feel like when I originally watched the show, I was like, God, that woman sucks. But I knew Allison Williams was brilliant in it. And then the older I get, the more I understand Marni. She’s actually so wrapped up in herself. She can’t even help it.
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What is the first fandom you lost yourself in?
I kind of pride myself in the fact that while I’m a big fan of people, but I’ve never showed up at someone’s hotel…But I probably lost myself a little bit in One Direction. I love “Heart Attack” and “Fireproof”.
What is something you bought recently after LOTS of research?
I would say if it feels like a meatier purchase than what I usually make, I make myself think about it for a week before I press “buy”. I’m like, “do I really want this?” But mostly I just know I’m going to buy it. I just think it’s important to not be able to get everything you want all the time, whenever you want it.
[The last big purchase I got] were these shoes from the Row.A fictional world you want to live in and why?
I think I would like to live in the New York of Girls and I think I’d like to live in Stars Hollow. I would also like to go to Hogwarts and I would like to be in A Bug’s Life.
Random thing in your home that always requires explanation?
I have four copies of Infinite Jest stacked up on one another. They were for a photo shoot I did and I’ve just left them.
LEVEL III
What’s an anecdote you usually tell to describe how you were as a kid?
On my first day of preschool the teacher asked — in front of all the parents and all the kids — if any kid wanted to get up and share something with the class. So I got up and I sang the first minute of “Goodbye Earl” by The Chicks, which is a song about domestic abuse. My mom cut it off and went, “woo!” She says she stopped me…And now I’m here.
What is your lowkey hell and actual heaven?
I think my low-key hell is the days I find myself on the couch with nothing to do between the hours of three to five. I think three to five is a witching hour during the day. I know three to four is the witching hour during the night, but three to five during the day is as spooky.
Actual heaven is when my mom is whispering something a little bitchy to me in a public place.
What is your most unhinged coping mechanism?
I just chew nicotine gum. I think it’s less of a coping mechanism and more of a great passion.
What is one random thing you hate so much for no apparent reason?
I really dislike when I am told to chill. Even “chill out” is better than chill. I find that to be very rude.
How do you exit a party?
Sometimes I just slip right out and then sometimes I say goodbye to the host or whoever I found myself talking to most that night. Pretty standard ways to leave.
How you wanna go (either un-seriously or seriously).
Definitely unserious. I mean, it’s just more fun.