beabadoobee would like to know why you hate cats, plz

Welcome to mixed feelings’ Hyperspecific, a profile series of increasingly intimate questions in which we ask our favorite artists, scientists, musicians, and the like to unveil their innermost selves — their weird existential musings.

Two summers ago, I sat in front of a Google Slides document titled “mixed feelings internal brand deck” and typed out a list of names. It was a list of illustrative talent — artists, actors, musicians, and activists that we hoped someday we would feature on this newsletter. Beabadoobee was at the top of that list.

The London-based singer-songwriter is everything we dreamed mixed feelings could be once it took shape: introspective but silly, cute with teeth, punk and romantic, anxious yet brave. At the time, Bea had just released her second studio album, Beatopia, and I had “Talk” and “Pictures Of Us” playing on repeat.

I think about that summer often — of brainstorms over drinks and inspiration sent via memes — and the summer after, when I saw Bea perform live at Terminal 5. This summer, serendipitously, another Bea moment crept into my life by way of an intimate performance of “Glue Song” at her agent’s East Village apartment, and an interview for our column Hyperspecific.

Bea was in New York doing press ahead of the release of her third album This Is How Tomorrow Moves (out now) and that list of “illustrative talent” was becoming a very real thing.

The new album blends all the things I love about Bea’s work — punk energy that can only be achieved by a girl who was raised by Pavement’s Stephen Malkmus and a melancholy folk-pop spirit that boils the experience of being a girl today down to its simplest, purest parts.

Listen to the album from front to back. I’d be surprised if you aren’t head-banging through track 5 and wiping tears by the time you get to track 6, “Girl Song.” Bea sat down in our studio, speaking just above a whisper, to take our Hyperspecific questionnaire. It’s a delight, below.

Xo, Mi-Anne

LEVEL I

1. Something you’re always hoping people bring up in conversation when you first meet.

   Cats, by a country mile. Always cats. Every time I start a conversation with someone, I really hope they own a cat or like cats because I know a lot of cat facts. [My cats] do some unhinged shit, but I'm like, I love you.

2. A positive trait people always tell you you have.
   I'm only friends with my secondary school friendship group. I've known them since I was 11 and I feel like I'm pretty much the same person as I was in school. None of that's really changed.

3. One destructive trait you know you possess and wish you didn’t.
   I talk about it a lot on my new record, but I find comfort in familiar places and sometimes that's chaos. Sometimes when I find myself in something healthy, I am so used to things not being healthy that I'll self-sabotage and try to make it bad. But I'm aware of it now. I've written a lot of songs about it…I'm aware of it and I can change it.

4. If a bodega were to name a dish after you, what would it be? (Be specific.)
   The Bea special. I'm not going to lie…I love a pesto mozzy sandwich, like pesto, mozzarella, and tomatoes. I love that. And I mean, I can't really claim it as mine, but that's my favorite sort of sandwich.

5. One song that makes you feel understood.
   A song by Lali Puna [and Two Lone Swordsmen] and it's called, “It's Not the Worst.” The song consists of one lyric: “It’s not the worst I've ever looked, it's just the most I've ever cared.” It is still something I have to constantly remind myself: You don’t look any different from yesterday. You just care more. There's a song on my record called “Girl Song,” and I wrote it a week before my period. I didn't understand why I was obsessing over this spot on my face, then I realized, oh my God, I look just the same as I did yesterday. The hormones are crazy today.

   I [also] love Daniel Johnston. I have a tattoo of his eye bat that he used to draw. When I was recording an EP called Our Extended Play, we were staying in a really beautiful studio and Matthew, who I'd worked on the EP with, had all of the original Daniel Johnston tapes. I was staying in a room with all of his original tapes and I was looking at all his drawings…I think he's an incredible artist with an incredible story. I love his songwriting.

6. Something you think is wildly underrated.
   Old UK pop radio like James “Morrison…“you give me something that makes me scared.” That song, and songs that could be on a Bridget Jones soundtrack. “I Try” by Macy Gray or “Warwick Avenue” by Duffy — those songs.

LEVEL II

1. A movie you watch when you want to self-soothe.
   Any of the Bridget Jones movies or a Richard Curtis film. I really do love Love Actually…They're not movies that I would constantly watch or feel drawn to watch, but when I feel a little bit sad and I want to get happy [I watch a feel good movie].

2. What’s the first fandom you lost yourself in.
   Obviously One Direction. I was a massive Directioner. I even made a One Direction movie with my mate, Anya, so we could meet the boys. We’d walk around Westfield with 1D painted on our faces. Tragic. So tragic. [The film’s] on YouTube, but before you will find it I will delete!

3. Your problematic fave artist/actor/musician (dead or alive). And why?

   I was going to say Megamind…he's actually really nice and I love Megamind. He's a good guy. He's a great guy! He's misunderstood.

4. Something you bought recently after LOTS of research.

   I’m a very impulsive buyer, I tend to buy things without thinking. There was a cute little market that I happened upon in Northwest London. I was going to see my boyfriend's mother. I was late, but I stopped to buy this little milk cup with a bunny on it and grass and everything.

5. Who do you main in your favorite video game. 
   I don't really play a lot of video games. The video game I play the most is probably Skate 3, but that's because my boyfriend and I just play a lot of Skate 3. I used to play Spider-Man over lockdown.

LEVEL III

1. What’s an anecdote you usually tell to describe how you were as a kid?
   It was ‘World Book Day’ and I remember making such a fuss about it with my dad saying, “Look, I have to be the best dressed. I'm going to go as a munchkin. I'm going to have to buy a gown. Mama's going to have to do my makeup and I'm going to walk into school and everybody's going to love it.” So we spent all weekend trying to find a munchkin dress. I was so excited. I walked into school and, lo and behold, no one was dressed for ‘World Book Day’ because it was lame to dress up for ‘World Book Day.’ There are so many Facebook photos of me with these massive red circles painted on my face…I was gobsmacked.

2. What is your low-key hell and actual heaven?
   [My low-key hell is]…it’s real life, except I’m a ghost and I can speak to no one and I can't do anything. I’m just trapped in my life and in the city, but I can’t have any interactions. Reality is this close, but I’m just not there…And then my heaven would be being with all my friends, my boyfriend, and loads of cats and animals on a farm somewhere.

3. One time you laughed so hard you cried. 
   Yesterday, Linda, my US agent, dropped a bottle of champagne whilst some girl was singing a really beautiful, emotional song. It was like a drum solo in the middle of the song. I honestly couldn't hold it together. There was champagne all over the floor. I just looked back and I saw my boyfriend just cleaning up all the champagne. It was so funny. It was just like the worst timing ever.

4. Random thing you hate so much for no apparent reason.
   When someone says they hate cats…You can be a dog person and you can be a cat person, but you can't just hate cats. I feel like dogs are very easily pleased and they literally fall to your feet and worship you. I feel like with cats, the satisfaction comes from working to get that love. So I always think that's a little bit strange. How could you not like cats? Do you just love being worshipped very easily? I dunno, but I love dogs too. You can love both.

5. How you exit a party.
   I try to be as polite and as possible and say bye to everyone. If I'm too drunk, it's a French exit type thing. I will tell one person to send everyone my love and then just disappear. I need to go home at that point.

6. How you wanna go (either un-seriously or seriously).
   I never think about death. The idea of death freaks me out. I mean, as long as I die happy, then I'm fine.