hannah bahng would like to set her corpse ablaze in a viking funeral

Welcome to mixed feelings’ Hyperspecific, a profile series of increasingly intimate questions in which we ask our favorite artists, scientists, musicians, and the like to unveil their innermost selves — their weird existential musings.

I want Hannah Bahng to like me so bad. We have so much in common! We love Attack on Titan (disagree on Eren, though). We both ironically play the Wii Fit Trainer in Super Smash Bros Ultimate. We live for Pokémon conspiracy theories! The friendship potential is unmatched even if the closest I’ll get to realizing it is asking her 18 increasingly intimate questions for Hyperspecific.

Which is eerily appropriate, seeing as Hannah is a huge fan of icebreaker questions, too. She even shared her own list, after answering all of ours:

1. What’s your favorite color? (“You can tell by the vibe of what they give off.”)

2. What’s your favorite dinosaur? (“People don’t ask anymore!”)

3. Where do you think we get our sense of morality from? (“Love hitting them with that as a third question.”)

4. If everyone died right now, what would you do? (“And if you had 24 hours to live, what would you do?”)

5. Do you think about how you’ll never have enough time to learn about everything in the universe? (“Like hitting people with that.”)

6. What’s your favorite conspiracy that you believe in? (“A fun one.”)

7. Would you rather look like Jar Jar Binks or talk like Jar Jar binks? (“And you can’t kill yourself.”)

The singer-songwriter has infectious energy (clearly), which is an interesting juxtaposition to her dark and moody musical repertoire. Take “Abysmal” the title track on her new EP — a rip-me-open-type piano ballad that puts into words that bruised feeling of a relationship ending with questions left unanswered (more on that later).

In other words, hats off to our own casting, because Hannah Bahng is as mixed feelings as they get. Read her full interview, below.

stay thirsty, Mi-Anne

LEVEL I

1. Something you’re always hoping people bring up in conversation when you first meet.

   I always hope that people will ask me what my favorite dinosaur is. I feel like people don't ask that anymore! When I was younger I would get that question a lot, but I want to bring it back. My favorite dinosaur is a stegosaurus.

2. A positive trait people always tell you you have.
   I have heard that I have pretty good energy — warm energy — which is the biggest compliment that someone could give, in my opinion.

3. One destructive trait you know you possess and wish you didn’t.
   I definitely get frustrated at myself very, very easily because I just want to strive to be the best that I possibly can. I know that sometimes it can get destructive when you're always continuously striving…I get really frustrated with myself and angry at myself. It hurts me.

   
   One of the easiest things to get me out of the mindset is to just sit down at the piano and start writing it down. I think “What Never Lived” [is a new song where] I sat down and was like, yo, I need to get this out…It’s about how I think situationships are stupid. Nobody wants to commit to anything real. It’s tough out here in the romantic scene of things!

4. If a bodega were to name a dish after you, what would it be? (Be specific.)
   This is so fun. I'm going to add this to my list of icebreakers…Bahng Bahng Noods…It would be a peanut noodle dish that's salty and savory, and it has crushed peanuts on the top and scallions and coriander, which I know you guys call it “cilantro” here…Bahng Bahng Noodles. Nobody take that! I should trademark it.

5. One song that makes you feel understood.
   I was listening to Billie Eilish’s album, Hit Me Hard and Soft, and as soon as I got to “The Greatest”, I was like, damn, it's really hitting right now. It's a really, really relatable song. “All my love and patience…all the times I waited for you to want me naked, made it all look painless. Man, am I the greatest?” I just feel like everything in that song is so relatable, man.

6. Something you think is wildly underrated.
   Gnomes are so underrated. They keep your garden safe. It’s a little trinket to keep you safe. Also, Cubone…very underrated Pokémon. I love Cubone but oh my God, he has some trauma. There's actually this conspiracy theory that Cubone is actually Charmander with the skull of his dead mom. It's kind of crazy conspiracy.

   

   r/Pokemon thread by RayanTheShell; Jeff Goldblum's Needles tracksuit in Kaos (important.)

LEVEL II

1. A movie you watch when you want to self-soothe.

   I was on an insane Adam Sandler kick where I watched every single feel-good Adam Sandler movie. But I rewatch cartoons so much. I have five that I just rewatch all the time. SpongeBob and Bob’s Burgers I rewatch a lot. I recently started The Simpsons, which is kind of fun. And there's this cartoon called The Miraculous Misadventures Flapjack. If that show didn't exist, I'm just saying, Adventure Time and Regular Show and Gravity Falls might not have existed. I watch all of them on repeat. Then I’m going to add Family Guy as my last one.

2. Your problematic fave artist/actor/character/musician (dead or alive). And why?
   I guess Eren in Attack on Titan. I wouldn't say I'm a Yeagerist, but man’s had some trauma! I don't want to spoil anything just in case you haven't watched it, but Attack on Titan is a great anime, go watch it.

3. What’s the first fandom you lost yourself in.

   It's definitely an anime one. I was, am a nerd. I was really into Kuroko no Basuke. I was into a lot of sport anime growing up, like Haikyu and Free!.

4. Something you bought recently after LOTS of research.

   I have this amazing, amazing Needles tracksuit, top and bottom. And the only reason I got it is because I was watching this show called Kaos on Netflix. Please watch it. They canceled it after season one and you can tell that it was supposed to be a many-season-type show because it ends on a cliffhanger. It's a stacked, stacked fricking cast, and it's about Olympus mythology. Jeff Goldblum plays Zeus, but basically he's wearing a Needles track suit. And I was like, I need that. This is going to be my personality.

5. Who do you main in your favorite video game. 
   On the rare occasion I play Mario Kart. I am always playing Waluigi. Underrated character! I love Waluigi. He's too long. That he barely fits in the car is part of the charm. In Smash Bros I’ll play the Wii Trainer, have you seen her? She has a hula hoop and stuff. And it's really funny. I like using the characters that kind of aren't very good, but I like seeing if I can win with them. It’s a little bit of a challenge.

6. Dream game night rotation.

   Raphael from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles because he kind of has anger issues and I feel like we could get a competitive thing going. Mr. Poopybutthole from Rick and Morty, just to see what the vibes are. Jake the dog from Adventure Time because he's magical…and extremely competitive. Mr. Poopybutthole would keep it light, keep the feng shui nice. And finally Pops from Regular Show. He would keep the mood nice.

Waluigi’s legs barely fitting into any vehicle.

LEVEL III

1. What’s an anecdote you usually tell to describe how you were as a kid?
   There are two. There's this video of me where I’m falling asleep on the couch. I'm like two years old, cracker in hand. Then my dad is like, do you want me to take that from you? And I'm like, “noooooo.” There's also one where I am with my brother and we're dancing and then he takes my arms and tries to force me to dance — you know how brothers are. And I spit on the floor. It was a regular occurrence. I would spit on the floor when I was mad. I'm not sure why I’d do that. Maybe I've just always been gangster. I don't do that anymore, but back in the day, she was a rebel.

2. What is your low-key hell and actual heaven?
   Low-key hell is slow walkers. I feel like you guys can relate because New York people are fast. I like it here.

   Actual heaven is when you're snuggled in bed. It's warm, but it's cold outside. Just simple things. Oh, and Mala dry pot. That is actual heaven.

3. Last time you laughed so hard you cried.

   I was having Thanksgiving with my manager's family and we had a friend, Zoe, over. There was a flower pot in front of me and my manager’s mom. I couldn't see the mom and I would just be peekaboo [from behind the flower pot]. For whatever reason Zoe and I thought it was so funny. It was that kind of night.

4. Random thing you hate so much for no apparent reason.
   Mayonnaise. I hate mayonnaise literally so much. Pure disdain, disgust, and hate for mayonnaise. I also don't like eggs. The one time I will eat an egg is at K-bbq. Or gyeranjjim, the steamed egg dish. That's the only time I'll eat egg because it doesn't taste like egg. [When I was little] my mom tried to get me to get over the fear. She made me eat an egg sandwich and I puked. It was not good.

5. How you exit a party.
   I say bye to everyone I know at the party and then I dip.

6. How you wanna go (either un-seriously or seriously).

   I would love to go peacefully. But I do know how I want my funeral to be. I want it to be a Viking funeral.
   

   This is the picture: Me, my family, wait, I'm not there. My family, my friends waiting at a creek. No, it wouldn't be a creek, an ocean. Everyone's standing solemnly, hats in hand. And then my mom, possibly, unless I'm really old, maybe someone else who knows, I'll put it in my will. They use one foot and they kick off this wooden thing that I'll be lying peacefully on with one flower in hand and all of my treasured belongings around me. They kick me off peacefully into the ocean and I float out. Then, I have a previously-hired professional archer that has been training for this day, for this very moment. They stand far off on a hill that's 10 meters behind and they send a flaming arrow straight into my heart to set me on fire with all of my belongings. Then the wooden plank is ablaze on top of the water. I think that's a beautiful way to go out. So, technically cremation, I guess?