Though I definitely had some social media-related trauma from overuse, I wondered if there was a way to approach it differently and with more moderation. So, now I find myself in the present, where I am somewhere in the middle. I am not extremely offline, nor am I living 100% online. Depending on the day, month, or year, I can fall anywhere on the spectrum of on to offline. I have both IRL and URL worlds.
I’ve been off most social media over the summer and honestly it’s been so weird because the internet really does bleed into real life!!! Like the tiktok mannerisms thing - I haven’t been on tiktok in over a year and a half but I still find myself doing some of those tiktok mannerisms because everyone around me does them!! And I could tell that dressing up to see the barbie movie was a trend because people I knew were doing it. It’s like even if you’re offline you’re still living in a world essentially created by the internet/social media...but it’s still super cool to see how far all this social connection goes!
Super good read!! I really do think that finding a balance is the way to go :)
Really interesting response! Social media can be so toxic but I also think it is what you make of it. Posting pictures of my flat to a little community of people posting pictures of their houses on instagram gave me a reason to get out of bed when I had nothing else. It’s changed a lot since those days.
The thing about ‘hurt hunting’ is fascinating and makes a lot of sense. Thank you for sharing that. It’ll stay with me.
I haven’t had any social media besides YouTube for going on 6 years now. I subscribe to emails and blogs like this one and Forbes newsletters and things to stay informed and up to date. Im 30 and never downloaded the TikTok app but I love youtube shorts and watching people’s creative content. It makes me laugh and I never feel those negative emotions like jealousy that come up with more traditional social medias. I live in the same city as my family so we are pretty involved with one another but my husband has Snapchat with only his family on there and family group messages to send pictures and stay in touch with them.. outside of traditional social medias.
There are ways to balance, because I find it to hard to regulate my own emotions like “I just lost a job better stay off all my socials so I don’t get triggered or jealous” isn’t something I would be able to regulate. Better to just not have them all together for me!
love the part about hurt hunting I’ve never heard anyone else talk about that but it’s so true. i haven’t had tiktok for a year and a bit and have put time limits on things like insta and twitter. when i deleted tiktok i was worried i would be totally out of touch, but most things that are popular enough online will seep into other platforms so that made me less worried about missing out on trends
I moved social accounts (mostly Instagram) off my home screen about a year ago, and I find I almost never dip in. It's too much work to be a day to day habit anymore. Now, when I want to go there it has to be very intentional--since it requires me to flip to my last page of apps (about 5 pages back). It's not a perfect solution but just by not being on it daily my whole mindset/thinking about it's importance has shifted, without any big emotional social break up or declaration.
wow, nothing in a while has touched me like this piece did, thank you for both the person asking and for your answer. I just want to re read this over and over, so nice to "meet" you. I think life is quite literally an exploration, so very happy to see you here.
Oh the LinkedIn thing. It gets me every time. Wish I could delete it forever. I must stay connected in the event I'm forced to return to my industry. It's who you know, not what you know (casino gambling).
But oh is it painful to see the 'atta boys' promotions and success stories... especially when I'm really out of that niche, though still have one foot in the industry.
Great read... social media is such a love/hate for me. More disturbing than not, but it's how we communicate these day. Ugh.
highly recommend the screenzen app - it makes you wait five seconds whenever you try to open an app you've chosen to limit. being forced to pause and question the need for looking at it has been a MAJOR way for me to reasonably limit social media.
When social media apps are deleted from my phone (particularly Instagram) I actually notice that my brain has more time to breathe, process, and think. I feel like my quality of life really does go up just a little bit.
i’ve been more or less off social media for the past two and a half years and while i’ve seen many many good things result from that decision (especially since quitting twitter!!! that app genuinely made me evil), i have found myself a lot more isolated than i’ve ever been. and i understand that social media doesn’t hold a candle to real life interaction, but i think there’s something to be said about opening an app and seeing the random things your friends from far away are doing or seeing updates from your local farmers market or knowing when literally anything is happening or just seeing a #Stupid Thing! idk. i feel like a lot of the “i quit social media and i’m the happiest person in the world because of it” content out there never really addresses the very human reasons why we go to social media in the first place and misses out on a lot because of it. thank you for this article <4
I’ve been off most social media over the summer and honestly it’s been so weird because the internet really does bleed into real life!!! Like the tiktok mannerisms thing - I haven’t been on tiktok in over a year and a half but I still find myself doing some of those tiktok mannerisms because everyone around me does them!! And I could tell that dressing up to see the barbie movie was a trend because people I knew were doing it. It’s like even if you’re offline you’re still living in a world essentially created by the internet/social media...but it’s still super cool to see how far all this social connection goes!
Super good read!! I really do think that finding a balance is the way to go :)
Really interesting response! Social media can be so toxic but I also think it is what you make of it. Posting pictures of my flat to a little community of people posting pictures of their houses on instagram gave me a reason to get out of bed when I had nothing else. It’s changed a lot since those days.
The thing about ‘hurt hunting’ is fascinating and makes a lot of sense. Thank you for sharing that. It’ll stay with me.
I haven’t had any social media besides YouTube for going on 6 years now. I subscribe to emails and blogs like this one and Forbes newsletters and things to stay informed and up to date. Im 30 and never downloaded the TikTok app but I love youtube shorts and watching people’s creative content. It makes me laugh and I never feel those negative emotions like jealousy that come up with more traditional social medias. I live in the same city as my family so we are pretty involved with one another but my husband has Snapchat with only his family on there and family group messages to send pictures and stay in touch with them.. outside of traditional social medias.
There are ways to balance, because I find it to hard to regulate my own emotions like “I just lost a job better stay off all my socials so I don’t get triggered or jealous” isn’t something I would be able to regulate. Better to just not have them all together for me!
love the part about hurt hunting I’ve never heard anyone else talk about that but it’s so true. i haven’t had tiktok for a year and a bit and have put time limits on things like insta and twitter. when i deleted tiktok i was worried i would be totally out of touch, but most things that are popular enough online will seep into other platforms so that made me less worried about missing out on trends
I moved social accounts (mostly Instagram) off my home screen about a year ago, and I find I almost never dip in. It's too much work to be a day to day habit anymore. Now, when I want to go there it has to be very intentional--since it requires me to flip to my last page of apps (about 5 pages back). It's not a perfect solution but just by not being on it daily my whole mindset/thinking about it's importance has shifted, without any big emotional social break up or declaration.
Hi.
Somewhere in the middle sounds about right.
Great article. It’s a tough world we live in.
FOMO is a problem!
Thanks Lee for all your input.
Maggie
wow, nothing in a while has touched me like this piece did, thank you for both the person asking and for your answer. I just want to re read this over and over, so nice to "meet" you. I think life is quite literally an exploration, so very happy to see you here.
Oh the LinkedIn thing. It gets me every time. Wish I could delete it forever. I must stay connected in the event I'm forced to return to my industry. It's who you know, not what you know (casino gambling).
But oh is it painful to see the 'atta boys' promotions and success stories... especially when I'm really out of that niche, though still have one foot in the industry.
Great read... social media is such a love/hate for me. More disturbing than not, but it's how we communicate these day. Ugh.
highly recommend the screenzen app - it makes you wait five seconds whenever you try to open an app you've chosen to limit. being forced to pause and question the need for looking at it has been a MAJOR way for me to reasonably limit social media.
When social media apps are deleted from my phone (particularly Instagram) I actually notice that my brain has more time to breathe, process, and think. I feel like my quality of life really does go up just a little bit.
i’ve been more or less off social media for the past two and a half years and while i’ve seen many many good things result from that decision (especially since quitting twitter!!! that app genuinely made me evil), i have found myself a lot more isolated than i’ve ever been. and i understand that social media doesn’t hold a candle to real life interaction, but i think there’s something to be said about opening an app and seeing the random things your friends from far away are doing or seeing updates from your local farmers market or knowing when literally anything is happening or just seeing a #Stupid Thing! idk. i feel like a lot of the “i quit social media and i’m the happiest person in the world because of it” content out there never really addresses the very human reasons why we go to social media in the first place and misses out on a lot because of it. thank you for this article <4
yes! moderation is sexy