I used to hate the term biological clock, but lately I feel like it's really been ticking. How do I get over the fact I'm doing some work first to give my kids a steady future, while also worrying I'm running out of time?
Thank you for sharing this! My best friend grew up in a similar situation - older parents, and professors at that, and had an incredibly enriching childhood 💕
I had my children early (at age 25 and 27) while going to law school and for most of it as a single parent. My life was stressful, chaotic and
mostly joyful. When I started working I always felt as if I was not doing justice to one role (mother) or the other (lawyer). My daughters both delayed having their children (one son each) born when my older daughter was pop
Thank you for sharing your story 🥲 though I’ve not had children, something tells me that the pressures we may feel about not doing enough will rear their heads no matter what age you are. I’m sure you and your daughters both have joyful and beautiful memories and experiences of motherhood ❤️
I have to say I loved every stage of their growing up. But watching my daughters be parents their late 30’s and 40’s I can see that they are wonderful parents in a way I could never have been in my 20’s.
« What matters is that you feel passionately about the work you do and that you feel passionately about raising a human being; if you are able to embed love, compassion, humility, and a sense of humour into all of your ambitions, you cannot “fail,” even when you misstep. »
This is so spot on! The pursuit is not perfection, but passion!
love the bit at the end that acknowledges how life is filled with mistakes no matter how carefully or thoughtfully you plan. mistakes are inevitable and having a compassionate, kind, and honest approach to life will serve one much better than trying to always make the “right” decisions only to find out that the “right” decision can and will have its own unforeseen consequences.
Couldn’t agree more🥲 I loved what Charlie wrote about how you will miss a soccer practice and a tenure review - i find it so dangerous that women in particular are told we can “have it all.” Language like that sets us up to fail.
I'm a 31 yo F filmmaker and get incredible validation from this. You're not alone, you're valid. The feelings of stress, anxiety, and grief make sense. As I go through my own version of these feelings, I'm realizing that the most peace I can achieve is in accepting my feelings and the situations I find myself in. Fighting those emotions causes me the most pain. I have a lot of wants to start a family and find career success. But, like you, I want to reach them responsibly and know most things are out of our control. I always hear 'You'll never be ready', and while there's merit to that - we know ourselves best. So kindly, trust that. All in all, the combination of -- trusting myself, accepting what's out of my control, and accepting my wants and fears -- has been most helpful to me as I seek a solution. Know you're in good company, and you're valid. Best to you as life happens, wishing you all the things you seek!
“I always hear 'You'll never be ready', and while there's merit to that - we know ourselves best.” This part 🥲 completely agree. There are so many platitudes when it comes to this topic in particular, it’s so nice to hear people’s real opinions, fears, and challenges. Makes me feel less alone 🥹
i grew up with older parents too and its lovely to hear abt the other side of it beyond the fear - the wisdom, intimacy ... thank u 💛
Thank you for sharing this! My best friend grew up in a similar situation - older parents, and professors at that, and had an incredibly enriching childhood 💕
I had my children early (at age 25 and 27) while going to law school and for most of it as a single parent. My life was stressful, chaotic and
mostly joyful. When I started working I always felt as if I was not doing justice to one role (mother) or the other (lawyer). My daughters both delayed having their children (one son each) born when my older daughter was pop
Thank you for sharing your story 🥲 though I’ve not had children, something tells me that the pressures we may feel about not doing enough will rear their heads no matter what age you are. I’m sure you and your daughters both have joyful and beautiful memories and experiences of motherhood ❤️
I have to say I loved every stage of their growing up. But watching my daughters be parents their late 30’s and 40’s I can see that they are wonderful parents in a way I could never have been in my 20’s.
« What matters is that you feel passionately about the work you do and that you feel passionately about raising a human being; if you are able to embed love, compassion, humility, and a sense of humour into all of your ambitions, you cannot “fail,” even when you misstep. »
This is so spot on! The pursuit is not perfection, but passion!
love the bit at the end that acknowledges how life is filled with mistakes no matter how carefully or thoughtfully you plan. mistakes are inevitable and having a compassionate, kind, and honest approach to life will serve one much better than trying to always make the “right” decisions only to find out that the “right” decision can and will have its own unforeseen consequences.
Couldn’t agree more🥲 I loved what Charlie wrote about how you will miss a soccer practice and a tenure review - i find it so dangerous that women in particular are told we can “have it all.” Language like that sets us up to fail.
I'm a 31 yo F filmmaker and get incredible validation from this. You're not alone, you're valid. The feelings of stress, anxiety, and grief make sense. As I go through my own version of these feelings, I'm realizing that the most peace I can achieve is in accepting my feelings and the situations I find myself in. Fighting those emotions causes me the most pain. I have a lot of wants to start a family and find career success. But, like you, I want to reach them responsibly and know most things are out of our control. I always hear 'You'll never be ready', and while there's merit to that - we know ourselves best. So kindly, trust that. All in all, the combination of -- trusting myself, accepting what's out of my control, and accepting my wants and fears -- has been most helpful to me as I seek a solution. Know you're in good company, and you're valid. Best to you as life happens, wishing you all the things you seek!
Cheers.
“I always hear 'You'll never be ready', and while there's merit to that - we know ourselves best.” This part 🥲 completely agree. There are so many platitudes when it comes to this topic in particular, it’s so nice to hear people’s real opinions, fears, and challenges. Makes me feel less alone 🥹